"Squeaky"

Curtis:  What's goin' on?

Me:  Well, we have some baby squirrels in our storage building in the back yard.

Curtis:  Oh really?  Baby squirrels are kinda fun.  We used to have some as pets. 

Me:  You did?

Curtis:  Oh yeah.  I was pretty little.  I'd say 5 or so.  One day, Carol Don, said he was climbin' up this Oak tree to get some baby squirrels 'cause the mama was gone.  You know, its West Texas, so the Oak trees aren't very big out there.  Well, Carol Don climbed on up there. He reached into that nest and that mama squirrel chomped down on his finger. Hehehe.  Like to took his finger off.  He jumped and fell outta that tree with the squirrel still on his finger.  I mean, she wouldn't let go!  Garland finally pulled out his pocket knife and cut its head off. They still had to pry the squirrels teeth off Carol Don's finger.  Like to scared me to death!

Me:  Wait a minute...you're telling me that squirrel was latched on so tight, your brother was able to grab it and cut its head off?

Curtis:  All the boys carried pocket knives back then.  They were sharp too.

Me:  That's horrific, dad.  Poor squirrel.

Curtis (unfazed by horrific mama squirrel death):  Anyway, after Garland cut its head off, Carol Don climbed back up and got the babies. There were 5 or 6 of them because I remember we each had a squirrel. We fed them pecans and milk. We had real cows milk back then so they grew fast. All of them ran off except for Garland's squirrel, "Squeaky."  He'd stay in the house with Mama while we went to school.  He liked to sit up on the top of the cabinets.  We'd leave him outside and in a little while he'd show up at the back door. He loved Garland. He'd follow him around everywhere.

Me:  He obviously wasn't holding a grudge against Garland for cutting his mom's head off.

Curtis: They're squirrels!  They don't know a damn thing.

Me:  What'd you call yours?

Curtis:  I don't know, "Spot" or something stupid like that. They turn into wild squirrels when they get older. You gotta get them when they're little little.

Me:  That's kind of a messed up story, Dad.

Curtis, Well, like I say, they're kinda fun.

Lonesome Dove

Curtis had a mild stroke a couple of weeks ago. I was concerned this might have caused some damage to his brain. I lost my concerns the other night when I asked him about the plot line of Lonesome Dove. We were in the midst of watching a spinoff called Return to Lonesome Dove when I asked:
"So what's the original about?"

Curtis:  "Well this one fella, he's hidin' from the law. Cause he accidentally shot this man. He came from Arkansas. Turns out that fella he shot was the Mayor of that town. There's this one woman - she's pregnant with this baby by her husband - but he got kicked by a horse and went into some kind of coma - he finally dies so she's headed Ogallala, Nebraska to find this one guy she really wants, Dee Boot."

Me:  "I'm sorry, what?  His name is Dee Boot?"

Curtis (Like nothing is strange about the name Dee Boot):  "Yeah.  So, anyway, she hooks up with these two guys who kindly protect her. One is a big ol' boy. He says 'I'm gone marry her' a lot. He's not real bright. Ha ha ha.

Anyway, Robert Duvall is in love with this whore and they come across this fella. I can't figure anything out about him except he likes killin'. That fella kills some people and steals Robert Duvall's girl. Then he tries to trade her to these Indians. There's a really good shoot out but then that killer guy slips off and stabs almost everybody. I mean he stabs almost EVERYBODY.  Then he's gone. Well you know, Robert Duvall and them have to bury those folks before they can go anywhere..."

At this point he stops the story because of some action on the TV. 
"Watch this," he says, "its a really good part.  My favorite scene."

I turn my attention to the TV where I see Barbara Hershey flirt with some guy.  They're talking about how they could fall in love with each other.  Lots of smiling and laughing is going on when all of a sudden an ambush happens.  Barbara Hershey gets shot, the guy she was flirting with gets shot 3 or 4 times.  One of the children gets shot in the leg. Another man and Native American woman are shot dead.  Barbara Hershey's potential love didn't die from the 4 bullet wounds, but instead rallies to protect her and go after the bad guy.  He kisses her while she's passed out then rides off on his horse and is ultimately mowed down.  Barbara and the kids live, but barely.

Me:  That's your favorite scene?

Curtis:  Yeah.  What?

Me:  I mean, they're all like, happy, about to fall in love, moving to a new land, full of hope.  Then they're just gunned down, barely able to defend themselves.

Curtis:  It was hard times in those days.

Me:  Hard times?  I'd say that getting shot up is more than just hard times dad.  I think I'm depressed now.

Curtis:  Don't be so dramatic.  It was rough country.  You had to be tough back then.  You need to toughen up.

He the proceeded to tell me the remainder of the original Lonesome Dove story (which took a good 20 minutes), breaking down into a fit of laughter when he recounted the part about Gus refusing to have his leg cut off because he might want to "kick a pig" sometime.  I think his memory's still good.

Dinner time

Me: What are you doing?

Curtis: Well, I'm eatin' a cracker.

Me: Just one?

Curtis: I had some spaghetti tonight.

Me: With a cracker?

Curtis (getting impatient): No, I had the spaghetti first and now I'm having a cracker. I can only do one thing at a time around here.