Genetics

Me:  Hey, didn't your dad have a cleft lip?

Curtis:  Huh?

Me (loudly):  A cleft lip - didn't your dad have one?

Curtis:  Naw, he didn't have a club foot...  He did have a hair lip though. 

Pug Exercise

Curtis:  How's Beans doing?

Me:  He's alright. We need to do something to get some weight off that dog. He's 24 pounds. 

Curtis:  He needs some exercise.

Me:  I know but the only place he wants to run is to his food bowl. 

Curtis:  Put his food bowl on a merry go round so he can chase it. 

Me:  You mean a treadmill?

Curtis:  Who was it the other day I saw had their dog on a treadmill?  He walked on it good. 

Me:  Where were you that you would see a dog walking on a treadmill? I don't think he would walk on a big treadmill anyway. 

Curtis:  You oughta get him a mini treadmill.  Or you could use a belt sander. 

Me:  A belt sander??  Wouldn't it sand off their foot pads?!

Curtis:  Naw.  He'll be alright.  

Stolen items

Curtis:  There should be two Betty Crocker cookbooks. I had one and your mother had one. 

Me:  The one at your house is mom's.  Her handwriting is in it. I use it at Christmas. I have never even seen another one in all these years. 

Curtis:  You probably took it and threw it away. 

Me:  Why would I do that?  When you can't find something I always get accused of taking it.  I'm not going around taking your stuff. 

Curtis:  Well I don't know what I did with it and I don't want to blame myself, so...

Me:  I guess that's as close as I'm going to get to you admitting you lost it.  

Curtis:  hehehe.